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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

God's call in my life



I’d like to start this post by sharing a couple of my favorite quotes from our Lord Jesus Christ: 

"John 10:27-30: “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow me.  And I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; neither shall anyone snatch them out of My hand.  My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of My Father’s hand.  I and the Father are one.”

"John 6:37: “All that the Father gives Me will come to Me; and the one who comes to Me, I will by no means cast out.”

God, in His sovereign grace, chose for me to be born into a Christian home, the youngest of four; to be raised by passionate, Spirit filled parents.  My mom led me in a prayer to receive Jesus Christ into my heart and life at the age of 5.  Now, was this when I “came to Jesus”, as the second part of Jn. 6:37 speaks to?  In hindsight, I would say no.  I began to hear the call of Jesus (Jn 10:27) from my earliest memories, through my mom’s Bible stories, to the neighbor’s Good News Club, to Sunday School lessons.  However, it was towards the end of my third grade year that this “call” became increasingly audible, and personal.  This “call of our Savior” grew and developed into a very intimate and wonderful bond by the time I entered my teens – which is when my faith in our Lord would be seriously tested for the first time.


 1963 family photo
 
During my eighth grade year our once tight knit Christian family began to unravel; so I began praying that God would do whatever it takes, except for death, to bring our family back together again. So when my parents separated early in my 9th grade year – I felt certain this was what the Lord needed to do to eventually pull us together; even though the separation drove my oldest siblings away from the home, and my closest brother, Cliff, deep into the drug scene.  

It was tough watching Cliff dive into drugs.  He and I had been very close; just 19 months apart, he had taken me under his wings as his little buddy; we had always been best friends.  We shared the same room, the same set of friends.  My earliest memories in life were of Cliff and me playing with our stuffed animals.  We actually created a story around these stuffed creatures that became fairly elaborate as we grew up, and developed into a special connection between the two of us that continued throughout our teens.  When Cliff started into the drug scene – he developed a new set of “friends” – and though we remained close, our relationship became a little more distant. Even so, I had full confidence that God would work these circumstances out and our family would be stronger for it.

Unfortunately, it did take death to truly pull us together as a family.  My brother, Cliff, was 18 when he was hit by a car while riding his bicycle. God granted us some of that “peace that surpasses all understanding” (Phil. 4:7) to guide us through this experience.  But I was angry that He used death; it felt as if He had turned His back on me!  Not only did He use death, but He took away the person that had been closest to me for my entire life.  I remember telling God that this was TOO MUCH!  I determined that I would punish God by pulling back from the Him.  And though I could never truly stop believing in Him; I had heard His call, and I couldn’t deny that reality; I could, and did cease to follow Him as closely as I once had.
  
After about five years, I began to long for that once close relationship I had shared with our Lord.  However, it took nearly a decade of His prodding and wooing before our relationship would begin to resemble what it once was. Throughout this long decade, God never let go of me, and never let anyone or anything “snatch me from His hands”.  He is always faithful, even when I am not; but life, though not necessarily easier, is a lot better when I’m holding onto Him, and not pulling away from Him.

 1975 family photo (last time with Cliff)

I’d like to conclude by sharing two areas where the Lord has been testing my faithfulness recently. The first has to do with serving as an elder; the second with serving as an architectural missionary.  Both calls to service required commitments during the summer of 2011; both invite heightened spiritual attack from our adversary the devil; and the missionary service requires that I trust the Lord to lead others to provide my financial support.  To me; spiritual warfare and financial uncertainty sort of look like the giants that the Israelites saw when God was pointing them to the Promised Land in Numbers 13; I could respond like the Israelites and pull away, or respond like Caleb and Joshua and trust the Lord.  As shared earlier, I’ve tried the pulling away thing – NOT a good idea.  So, I would appreciate your prayers in these two areas. 

One final thought, I’ve been blessed to have had a relationship with the Lord throughout my life; I don’t know, and can’t fathom how anyone can cope in this world without our Lord Jesus Christ as their Savior and Guide.  If you don’t know the Lord, I urge you with all that is within me to call out to Him today, and begin to know what true life really is.

2009 family photo - with our kids, grandkids, and my (Ed's) brother, sister, and parents

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